March is an auspicious month...

I love this photo

Owls. ♡

Be-a-u-tiful

I need a kitty

Future tattoo??

I must live here

Will be purchasing this camera!!!

Such a lovely shot

Knicker knackers

I need. Hunter. Boots.

Birthday pinatas filled with sparkles? My dream come true.

Short post. It's Friday. I'm filled with love, Spring, and the thrill of being done with moving (almost). YAYAYAY!

Well, here goes nothin'.

I was thinking that when you move out of your home you also lose a piece of your identity. Not saying that where you live identifies you but rather, what happens in your home shapes you and makes you who you are.

I went through it when I first moved out of my parents house when I was 18, moved back into my parents house when I was 19, and moved back out when I was 20. Each time I move, I leave pieces of myself behind me. In other words, I grow with each transition.

Now, I'm not moving back into my parents house but moving in with another form of family -- my boyfriend. I can honestly call him my family and it really baffles me that I have opened myself up so much to a man (or little boy hehe). I tend to be guarded and that has been pointed out to me time and time again. I feel that this is the ultimate form of putting your guard down and truly sharing your life with someone else.

Now, there are so many stigmas against living with your significant other (rooted in the dismantling of a relationship, loss of one's individuality, and so on) and I have to admit that I was a believer.

Now that I'm in the position, though, I'm looking at it through rosy-colored specs. I believe that living with another can make or break a relationship and thus, gives me more of a reason to fight for what I do not want to lose. And that is him, myself, and the respect of space (for both of us).

Old habits die hard and I will need to squash some of mine (being OCD about things, being irresponsible of other's feelings and putting myself first) to last.

The odds are against us...but I've always been a lover of the underdog. And I am most certainly in that position at this point.

Whatever happens though, I want to know that I gave it my all.

I feel that because I recognize these feelings then I will be more aware of how things are going. I will be more responsible about situations.

Well, if this isn't growing up then I don't know what is!

Don't get me wrong. I am so grateful to have such a lovely man in my life who opened up his home to me in a time where I had no where else to go. I will forever be grateful. That he trusts me enough to invite me into his life on such a personal level, such as this.

But you gotta learn sometime, right?

And sometimes you don't get to choose when those times are.

Yes, I'm scared. But I'm also excited, overjoyed, happy, nervous, crazed (!!!), and most of all in love.

So here's to a new way to living (literally).

Hey, I can bleed as well as anyone but I need someone to help me sleep

Update.

Unfortunately, I am no longer reading my "currently devouring" book because, as I've stated, I'm currently devouring all things related to Shakespeare, Early American Literature, refugees, and Freedom Writers.

All this reading has got me feeling a little low, though. I wish I had some time to read what I want to read. I'm struggling just to stay on schedule. However, I know better. Things will only keep getting busier and busier until schools done. A girl can dream, though.

Life is peachy. I have no other updates really, except that I'm moving next week. I took off Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday so that I can get everything moved, cleaned, and turned in. And then...another chapter of my life begins -- I'll call the chapter "Living with One's Significant Other -- The Joys and Perils"....because I'm sure there will be both joys and perils. But I'm finally ready and excited to discover them.

Well...here are a few other things, too. : )

-locked my keys in my car yesterday

-got two parking tickets in one day

-planned a Saturday get away with Mr. Man to see a Shakespeare play in Minneapolis (nerd alert). If it helps, my class is going, too. So I'm not the ONLY nerd.

-got approved to pick up overtime this week (!!!)

-bought a Motely Crue lighter, a new wallet, and a new yellow coat for Spring

-listened to Counting Crows constantly since Saturday

-had a lovely dinner at Minervas -- chock full of fillet mignon and a bottle (or two) of wine.

-made a new friend in class

-has been generous lately and the queen of Karma is definitely on my side

Oh, and I can't possibly wait another second for Spring. It almost hurts. So here is some art that I enjoy and takes my mind off of the longing, if only for a short while.

Let's face it -- I will be this Gramma

Inspiration for future decorating...hmmm

Such a lovely photograph

Dream (of sorts) for my kitchen

Too adorable

Bedtime? Yes please.

So cute

And Happy Birthday to my best friends -- Danielle, Corbin, & Dan -- Get wild on your 21st. Miss you all.

He carried his childhood like a hurt warm bird held to his middle-aged breast.

My affinity for birds has grown into a complex obsession. Last year, my literature professor asked me, after seeing my sparrow tattoo, if i liked poetry. I informed him that yes, poetry is one of my favorite things; not only to read, but to write.

He said that he could see that and then asked me why I got a bird tattoo. I couldn't necessarily tell him why, but that I just liked the print. He informed me that poets are often lovers of birds because birds break the bounds of both earth and sky. birds are the only animal that inhabit both the earth and the sky and that anomaly has often fascinated poets. He then suggested that maybe the reason I found it necessary to have a bird permanently inked into my skin is a subconscious love and admiration of the species.

Since then, I feel a sort of responsibility to be a lover of birds. But recently it has become sort of nuts. I can't wait for Spring because I think I'm going to try my hand at bird watching...I know, I know...I'm becoming a little TOO weird. But hey, it's worth a shot.

My point is, however, I wanted to share some interesting art. Not all have to do with birds, but if you see quite a bit of them, you'll know why.

Possible new tattoo? ^^ Hmmm.

Once I get settled into my new humble abode, I plan to start a painting experiment. I haven't painted in a long time, unfortunately it has fallen on the back burner as of late. The experiment will be, yes, you guessed it!...Birds.

I want to explore a range of different techniques and species of birds. Abstract, concrete, a little of both. I also want to start out with birds that call South Dakota home. I think that it can be a cool learning experience for me. I am a hands on learner and this would be a great way to get familiar with birds that occupy my homeland.

That's all for now. I'm off to work. Bahhh.

More heart than brains

Alright, alright. Long overdue for an update in the life & times of Erin C. Markey.

Spring semester is going splendidly thus far. I have been bombarded with constant reading and writing but that's what I signed on for. I'd rather be doing that than crunching numbers or memorizing inane biology terms.

My most engaging class by far is Shake

speare. The more I read and learn about the Elizabethan era and Shakespeare's plays, the more insanely into it I get. I look forward to that class and love every minute of it. Not to mention, my favorite professor is teaching it, so that's a plus, too.

I was also asked to participate in

a research conference that will be held in May. Our group's topic would be the Merchant of Venice. Still to decide if I will do such a thing, considering my psycho schedule of work/school, but I think it would be a really cool, nerdy thing to partake in.

Life on the home front is good. Really good. Nothing too special or out of the ordinary, but things just feel right. At this moment in time I'm laying on my bed, listening to Broken Social Scene, and taking a break from Act III of my latest Shakespearean play. I'm in fucking love with Bill Shakespeare.

Heee.

I am also insanely sleep deprived. I do my best writing in the wee hours of the morning. I am also very productive at that time; when everyone else in the world is asleep, and there I am -- writing my little heart out. BUT as you can i

magine...that sort of behavior does not allow for much productivenes

s in the day time. Eh, I'll take my chances.

I've also been squeezing in drives around town whenever I can. Mindlessly driving is just one of those things I do to unwind. It's weird and can be dangerous (especially lately, considering my lack of sleep) but it is one of those act

ivities that can bring me back down to earth. After week-long spouts of no-time-to-do-anything-but-homework-and-work, it's nice to have a little somethin' somethin' I c

an do for myself, regardless of how wacky it may be.

I'd say it's time to get back to

my new favorite playwright, but I must share some pics of the most FANTASTIC hotel Justin and I found to stay in when we're traveling throughout the Pacific Northwest this July.

The one in Seattle (!!!)

The one in Portland (!!!)

We already have 'em booked! Now, all of our flights/hotel/train tickets and purchased and ready to go. Now, we just need to get there. YAY HOORAY.

And while you hurt with all that pain, the stars will kiss your pretty face.

Well, it's the first day of Spring semester 2010 tomorrow.

Whoop! And every time I think of "Spring semester" I of course think of Spring...and thus, yearn for green grass, lilacs, sunshine, and only having to wear a cardigan for a coat.

Things have been a little too routine lately. I get bored easily and to counter that I can be a bit of a busy body. Especially this time of year, when things are stagnant and cold and a lot of my friends are far, far away.

I've been reading a lot of E.E. Cummings lately, too.

I discovered Cummings when I was sixteen. His poetry struck a chord in me so deep that I devoured most of his poems in one night. But that's me to begin with -- a little obsessive.

But it was a special appreciation. That was when I first discovered poetry and I could relate with his poems - how they tangled with love and its mysteries, Spring time, and death.

Things that have always baffled me, and all of you, I'm sure.

He can also write in a manner that reflects an authentic emotion of longing, which as humans, we all feel.

It's beautiful poetry and I still know quite a few of his poems by heart.

He had a bit of a hard-on for writing about Spring and sex. I think that's what caught my attention first and foremost; the joy and thrill of reading something a little bit dirty. And then of course, my favorite season.

I just remember sitting and listening to Mirah with a huge volume of his poems. Cigarettes and coffee and all my other vices.

Feeling so enthralled that I could identify with him. His work.

That was a hard but special time in my life. I was filled with a lot of curiosity. I was searching and investigating and digging into things that would leave an impression on me. To this day, in fact.

"Embrace your pain. Make it apart of you"

I just hope that I can write like that someday. Write what's true and identifiable. Push the boundaries of language!

I really just hope to be published one day. That's my one dying wish -- publish my shit!

I don't really tell many people about that. Because it's such a lofty goal. And I'm still so self conscious about my poetry and prose. I never feel like I'm doing it right. But that's the beauty of it, nothing can be right or wrong. I just want to be good.

Well, I think I've bled my heart enough during this blog entry. Ha ha. I'll leave you with one of my favorite poems from Mr. Edward Estlin Cummings.

"I like my body when it is with your body.

It is so quite new a thing.

Muscles better and nerves more.

I like your body.

I like what it does, I like it hows.

I like to feel the spine of your body and its bones, and the trembling-firm-smoothness and which I will again and again and again kiss.

I like kissing that and that of you.

I like, slowly stroking shocking electric fuzz of your electric fur and what-is-it comes over parting flesh...

and eyes big love-crumbs.

And possibly I like the thrill of under me you so quite new."

♡